P*ssing into wind
Stand-up comedy vs newsletter writing
The first time I performed stand-up comedy, I went blank on my second joke. I stood there, and all I could think was “shit!”. Fortunately, it was a supportive crowd who were aware it was my first gig. They cheered me on, I recalled my lines, and off I went. I recovered the set and did pretty well, it felt good and I got really encouraging feedback afterwards. Enough to try again!
A month later, I stepped onto stage for the second time. Second joke: blank again. WTF! Didn’t I learn from the last time? Seems not. This time, the audience were unaware I was still fresh. After what seemed a lifetime, I managed to get going again but it was too late. The rest of the set did not go so well, I never recovered. I stayed cool, walked off head held high for giving it a go, yet I could not ignore the tail between my legs.
In the comedy scene, this is called bombing. It’s inevitable. It sucks.
Stand-up comedy is like pissing into the wind. You’re exposed, vulnerable, and if you aim wrong you know about it.
My third gig went much the same. Blank on the second joke again! It had become a psychological barrier. Bombing is good for one thing: learning. From it I found a path forward. I wrote a joke about it:
“Going blank on my second joke is just like high school, I never got past second base.”
My plan was, if I went blank around my second joke again, I’d divert to this joke and use the time delivering it, to work out how to recover from there.
Fourth gig. I think subconsciously, I really wanted to use the new gag. I didn’t set out to go blank, but yet again I did. The recovery joke worked a treat. From there, my whole set flowed and went well.
This joke, with a few more on the same theme to stretch the bit out, is now a frequent part of my opening sequence. It (nearly) always gets a great response, and sets the tone for my performance. This always feels good.
Back on the wind analogy, there’s a certain art to pissing into the wind. Setting up the right angle, waiting to see if you get wet, then a rush of relief when hearing it hit the sweet spot on the ground.
I’ve come a long way from the stumbling beginnings, but I’m no professional comedian. For the most part, I bust it out on the (unpaid) open mic scene. It’s fair to say I don’t do it for the money (well, not yet – we can all dream!). I’ve got “the bug”: an addiction to the adrenalin rush of getting up there and the dopamine hit of a joke hitting the sweet spot. I just love it.
I’ve had a few people ask me recently why I’ve started writing1. With my subscriber numbers at a mere 24, it’s not about the killer following (well, not yet – we can all dream!). I haven’t even turned on pledges let alone paid subscriptions, and much less expect I’d have a paid subscriber at this stage if I did, so it certainly isn’t for money.
If stand-up comedy is pissing into the wind, writing is shouting to a wall. I’ve talked to actual walls before, they don’t talk back. But sometimes, someone on the other side of the wall does, and that’s nice (usually, depends on who it is and what they say…). My heartfelt thanks to you for reading this.
Just like comedy, I’m doing this for me yet at the same time hope to have a positive impact. In comedy, that positive impact is joy and laughter. Here, my writing thus far feels (to me) tilted towards serious, with a bit of lightness here and there. In fairness, it’s basically philosophy and psychology stuff so serious goes with the territory, but I hope by dropping a few playful quips in here and there I can share good perspectives for a better life with some laughs along the way.
In the essence of purposelessness, I’m just seeing where this goes without being fixed on where that is or how it happens. I’m still honing my style and my ‘niche’, so I appreciate you being on this journey with me.
Feel free to comment or message me whenever you have something (nice or otherwise) you’d like to say, I get quite excited when the wall talks back. Anyone watching would think I’m crazy… but let them, after all, they’re probably right 🤪
Wall talking back! Lovely stories filled with meaning!!